Thursday, January 15, 2009

Lew Bryson for Senate


According to a post yesterday on his blog, Seen Through A Glass, Bryson is tossing his well-traveled hat into the ring-----in the state of New York. He decided to pen an open letter to Gov. David Patterson, whose task it is to fill the Senate seat that will soon be vacated by Hilary Clinton. In his missive to Patterson, Bryson makes some good ( and appropriately snarky) points:

I understand you have a job opening for Hillary Clinton's Senate seat. In light of some of the relatively unqualified people who have publicly expressed interest in the job, I'd like you to know that I am interested and I am available.
I'm doing this booze-writing thing, but with the number of days off Senators get, and the number of aides you get to do the heavy lifting, I don't think it should interfere. It would certainly make it easier to write a new edition of New York Breweries, and require every library in the state to buy a copy.
I'm not just looking at petty perks, either, although unlimited access to that Senate Navy Bean Soup is a draw. I'd like to serve New York and the nation as The Senator From Beer. There are some excellent breweries in New York, and although you've given them the back of your hand lately with talk of putting the beer tax back up (after your sainted predecessor Gov. Pataki lowered it; you should inquire why), I'm sure once you appreciate the employment benefits from increased brewery business you'll be whistling another tune.
I realize it's not a new idea, what with Scoop Jackson having been the "Senator From Boeing," and I think Dick Gephardt was essentially the Representative from Anheuser-Busch, but I'd be more even-handed, and represent the interests of the entire industry. Even that Belgian outfit, you know, the big place up in Baldwinsville. Oh, and those Belgian guys in Cooperstown, too.
Before you dismiss my idea as not having enough to do with representing the people of New York, I'd remind you that Senator Clinton seemed pretty focused on the presidency from the start of her first campaign; the national media certainly seemed to think so, and she didn't disappoint them. She didn't even live in New York until she decided to run for the Senate. My wife's family goes way back in New York, and if Hillary claimed Pennsylvania solidarity based on a vacation cabin in Lake Wallenpaupack, I figure Uncle Johnny's place on Amity Lake, outside of Wellsville should count.
I have no interest in the presidency, either. I'd go so far as to say that if drafted, I will not run; if nominated, I will not accept; if elected, I will not serve. Sorry, but that's how it goes. I have my scruples. I refuse to run for office, because all that fund-raising you have to do compromises your ethics. I'll only accept an appointment.But part of my appeal is that I'm not part of the paste-up new aristocracy that seems to think it has some kind of right to office. I'm not a Clinton, I'm not a Kennedy, and I'm not Ham Fish XVIII. I'm a Bryson, dammit, and we've never held any office, or expected anything handed to us because of something our father or mother or uncle did.
Really, I think I have every bit as much right to serious consideration as the other "candidates."And, lookie here, I have a blog. Which I understand you were asking about when you talked to Andy-boy Cuomo this weekend. I've been blogging for two years, and a lot of it about taxes and policy. There's some serious thought for you.Think about it, Governor.
I could be your man in Washington. I mean, what the hell? Why not?

Lew Bryson
Future Senator from New York

Imagine for just a moment the sound of his girlish laugh echoing off the marbled hallways and onto the Senate floor. Imagine!
But The Bearded One's got a point: Why not?

1 comment:

okbrewer said...

Hey, RP! When are ya gonna get rid of this piece on his royal hairiness and get back to your own blog!? After all the Senate seat has already been sold, er, I mean filled!